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Desiderium

by Avyakta

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"For there be divers sorts of death -- some wherein the body remaineth; and in some it vanisheth quite away with the spirit. This commonly occurreth only in solitude (such is God's will) and, none seeing the end, we say the man is lost, or gone on a long journey -- which indeed he hath; but sometimes it hath happened in sight of many, as abundant testimony showeth. In one kind of death the spirit also dieth, and this it hath been known to do while yet the body was in vigour for many years. Sometimes, as is veritably attested, it dieth with the body, but after a season is raised up again in that place where the body did decay. Pondering these words of Hali (whom God rest) and questioning their full meaning, as one who, having an intimation, yet doubts if there be not something behind, other than that which he has discerned, I noted not whither I had strayed until a sudden chill wind striking my face revived in me a sense of my surroundings. I observed with astonishment that everything seemed unfamiliar. On every side of me stretched a bleak and desolate expanse of plain, covered with a tall overgrowth of sere grass, which rustled and whistled in the autumn wind" - An Inhabitant of Carcosa, Ambrose Bierce ca. 1886.
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Hail holy light, those heaven-borne — eternal... or those close enough. May I express thee unblamed? Since God is light and never but in unapproached light. There’s eternal that lives in you, Bright light of the uncreated, That which existed before the sun, before the stars. There’s a rising world of waters dark and deep. Born of the formless void, It’s taken so long, but from the Stygian pool it flies on bolder wings while the wind sleeps. To an Orphean lyre I sing of chaos and eternal night. Revisit not these eyes. Thy piercing ray seemed bright, Only to find, in the end, it holds no dawn. - Satan's Speech to the legions of Hell; Paradise Lost, John Milton, 1667.
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Telesthesia 01:11
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The more things change, the more they stay the same. - Old adage.
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Her eyes were a dying flame that slowly became a frosted windowpane. Cryptic anomalies for my war dove. The night’s reflections off your skin Treading worlds when the veil was thin The saddest song on a violin Will the sleep catch you tonight? Hermes, she has traveled far. Nycteris in a bell jar. Trapped in the final au revoir. Show me the power of a true god’s wrath. Do I speak in an eldritch tongue? As they say when among... This could never go unsung. Amidst the tremors and shakes of a hurricane. To whom are you eternally servile? Dearest Lily of the Nile. Don’t exist in perpetual exile. Burning past the nightmare in its kiln. if you’re so disinclined From the lord you stood behind Then why do you seem so resigned? From Earth scraped, a jagged piece of flesh. After years of cold you sought to burn. Past the point of no return. All good things will come in turn. On the eve before the dawn of fright. Once we drank from kindred chalice. You, the labyrinth — I, Daedalus. So it felt analogous. Cuts and stabs from a poisoned heart. Who knew that light years would elapse, And shining stars would soon collapse? Fading forever into abstracts. The vexing chaos that is a black hole. Before we’re crucified and pine away Or face the light of the creeping fay The pieces fit, you’re the key to the gateway. Pass the threshold if you dare. Don’t live in the past For the dead travel fast If you live forever time can’t make things better.
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about

Desiderium (noun): an ardent longing, as for something lost.

The sophomore album released by Jesse Agins under the moniker of Avyakta. This album deals with themes of life and death, the struggle to do what is right instead of what is easy, and lastly moving on in spite of a desire to cling to the comfort of memories.

credits

released April 6, 2022

All music written by Jesse Agins

All instrumentation performed by Jesse Agins

Recording, Editing, Mixing, and Mastering by Jesse Agins with a special thank you to James Blass for consulting on the mixes and your endlessly helpful notes.

Vocals on "A Sleepless Dream," "I Sing of Chaos and Eternal Night," and "Lily of the Damned" by Jesse Agins

Vocals on "For the Dead (Travel Fast)" by Jesse Agins and Kait Gilleran.

Lyrics for "A Sleepless Dream" taken from "An Inhabitant of Carcosa" by Ambrose Bierce (public domain, ca. 1886)

Lyrics for "I Sing of Chaos and Eternal Night" taken from "Paradise Lost" by John Milton (public domain, ca. 1667)

Lyrics for "Lily of the Damned" by Jesse Agins

Lyrics for "For the Dead (Travel Fast)" by Jesse Agins and D.T. - Rest in peace, love.

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Avyakta New Jersey

Avyakta is a Sanskrit word meaning "devoid of form." In other words, something without limits. It is a one-person music project -- the dream child of Jesse Agins. The intention of this project is to experiment with music in whatever incarnation it might take. ... more

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